Ambivalent
by BlueMageOne
Summary: Valkyrie sheds light upon the mortal life of the frozen seeress, Lyseria, by journeying to her destroyed kingdom and determining why the seeress chose to sacrifice herself in the Arkdain Ruins.
1. Evil Tales and Obligations

_The valkyrie's golden feet dipped into the pale, murky water gently lapping against the edge of the floor beneath her. She noted with disdain that it glided as if influenced by an unseen hand, and from the eerie stillness emanating from below the surface, she knew that there was more to the Sunken Shrine than meet's the eye._

_"Odd. It moves as if it means to welcome my presence and draw me below," she remarked thoughtfully, eyes cast downward._

_"Maybe the…essence of the shrine wishes itself to be cleansed, Lady Valkyrie," her spearman offered._

_The valkyrie pulled back her toe and stood with a reassuring hand upon her blade. "I sense nothing redeeming nor pure from this…this vile prison. It houses the undead and it stands merely to mock me," she shot back, fine brows gathered together. Slowly she looked all around her; eyes penetrating through the surrounding four walls._

_"It's positively creepy. I wonder what sort of tragedy sparked, to turn this once-beautiful place into a house of filth," a woman said, some distance behind._

_"Quiet," the valkyrie rich voice rang out. The order reflected softly and the valkyrie swept across the room and wasting no time in pressing her pale hands against a wall. Her companions stood obediently behind her._

_For a time, the valkyrie didn't speak. Her all-seeing eyes had closed and her eyelashes fluttered gently at her face. Finally, she opened them and stared before her, transfixed._

_"A fool's quest for power befitting a god…it is no wonder that her temple now lays in ruins, crawling with the undead," she spoke with a quiet, horrified tone, yet her face betrayed no explainable emotion._

_"What happened here?" the woman whispered, glancing all about her in awe._

_The valkyrie parted her lips to speak, but then her gaze caught the gentle wave of the water and she slowly crept back to its edge. _

_"I believe that the specific answers we seek, are floundering in these pools of destruction. The walls are alive with tales of terror. The souls trapped within them are pleading to share their story of the events leading up to their enclosure. They yearn…" -and here, the valkyrie's grave tone rose higher and higher- "they yearn to wash their hands clean of their miserable existence forced upon them by the damned seeress whom they called their Empress!"_

_The Einherjar stood silent, awed by the power of her words, and dreaded the impending trek below the surface of the beckoning water._

_"You…you can see all that?" the boy said, moved and frightened by her explanation. His eyes roamed around the room and he seemed to inch closer to the exit._

_The valkyrie looked at him sideways and said, "I can see all of it. And you will be able to…someday. Being gifted with the ability to experience a psychic impression is not an ability belonging to Odin Himself. It is the inherent sensitivity in all of us,"_

_The boy nodded vigorously and ceased fidgeting._

_"For now," the valkyrie continued, turning her face back to the waters, "we will empty this once-sacred shrine of its unearthly inhabitants. To my side…"_

_The man and woman shouldered their lances and the boy scurried after them as the three approached their mistress. Without a word, they slipped into the green depths._


	2. Nostalgia Into Hope

- _19 years til the End of the World -_

"It was a grey spring morning, such as this one. Barren, isolated fields for miles, dampened and glistening from the fallen rain of the previous, quiet evening,"

The speaker paused.

"There was nothing to be heard, save for the painful cries of your labouring life giver, in our bedroom chambers. She had been wallowing in darkness and hurt for hours, yet she was determined to deliver you to term and rise to greet the next day's sun in hopes of recovery. She would not fail,"

Again, silence.

"It was the Holy Day, and the midwives crowded around her, murmuring comforting words to save the castle's air of tranquility and silence. As good little girls know, there is not an unnecessary sound to be made during the late worships of the afternoon, and your Mother…She struggled not to earn the judgement of the Father Odin,"

"Did she hurt?"

"She trembled like a good woman should, in the bed of her husband, quieted with the birth and knowing that she was doing her God's work. She rejoiced in her blood-soaked sheets of pain and delirium,"

"If I may, sir, a child of such a young and tender age should not be listening to vile and gruesome tales of future womanhood," a soft, kind voice suggested.

"You may be right, Malmury. Odin help us all if this one does not grow up to produce children of her own,"

The little girl blinked and tilted her head up at her father.

" 'Produce…children'?" she said, in a meek, unsteady voice.

"Don't worry your little, yellow head about it now," the Man said, averting his eyes and laying back in his chair.

"Perhaps I should take Lina to see her mother," the young man spoke again.

With a wave of his hand, the Man scoffed and said, "Do not bother. Her mother does not need to be graced with a child's unyielding eyes in her most vulnerable moment. It will be over soon,"

But it was not over soon.

Lina sat on the floor for what seemed to be hours and hours. Her little hands were pressed to the cold marble floor, and she leaned over staring transfixed at her distorted reflection. The Man sat a few feet away, layered in his ceremonial robes and gold chains, looking out the window. His chin rested underneath his greying beard, rings glistening in the morning's brightness. Her Friend, she knew, stood behind her, unmoving.

A few times, she was shushed and told to shut her mouth. Lina obeyed and drummed her hands, enjoying the sharp smack of flesh upon the floor. When the Man was irritated with this display of mockery, he barked at Malmury to take her away.

"Come now, Li, your Father will not tolerate such insolence," he whispered, sweeping the girl up off the floor and cradling her in his arms. He smiled gently as Lina kicked her heels into him and struggled to pull away.

"That's enough! See to it that she is quieted immediately and that my wife is not disturbed!"

Malmury heeded the order and quickly escorted Lina out of the room, a white hand over her mouth. Once outside in the corridor, he set her down and knelt, looking her in the eyes.

"Now, now, let's not make a fuss. Sir Reinn wants girls to be seen, and not heard,"

"I was being good!" Lina cried, her voice feeble. She stomped her foot for effect, and her blonde eyebrows were knit in defiance.

Malmary laughed softly and took her little fists in his hands, "Please keep your voice down. In a few hours, you are going to have a baby brother or sister. Your mother needs all the peace and quiet right now that she can get. You wouldn't want to make her upset by disturbing her birthing, would you?"

Small, translucent tears dripped from Lina's eyes, and her small mouth puckered and trembled as she said, "But I want to know if she is alright!"

"Your mother is absolutely fine, Lina. She is in good hands with the most wise, most caring women who have delivered babies all across the nation. They were here when you were born!"

Lina sniffled and looked at her feet, flustered. "Are you sure…"

"Yesh I'm shooooore," Malmury whispered, imitating her tone and embracing her. "Just think, you have someone new to play with soon. Your mother can do this," He let go of her hands as Lina confidently pulled away and straightened herself. She raised one hand hesitantly to her mouth, and Malmury gently slapped it.

"Ah, ah, you're a big girl now. No thumb-sucking," he scolded, and Lina ran a few steps ahead of him, angered. Malmury stood up and started to follow her down the silent hall and Lina suddenly stopped and turned to face him.

"You're going to play a game with me," she insisted.

Malmury caught up with her and looked down at her white, upturned face. "Oh, am I?" he said.

"Yes!" Lina cried, stomping her foot again. With that, she turned and dashed away from him, following the twists in turns in the corridor that led to her chambers. Malmury obediently followed quietly and with a small, amused smile on his face.

"What does Miss Lina have in store for me? A quick, unchallenging game of chess? A tutorial on how to be nice young lady?" he called softly.

If she heard him, she ignored the comments.

The girl was put to bed at her usual time; she willingly and silently pushed back her chair and mechanically stepped forward to her bed, eyes wide. Malmury's hands were linked together underneath his chin as he gazed thoughtfully at the board game in front of him.

"It appears as if you have won, again," he murmured, un-moving.

"I'm tired of this. Where is Mother?" Lina spat.

Malmury lifted his head and smiled slyly at her. "She will not be in tonight, to see you off to bed," The jesting tone did little to melt the frown from little Lina's face. Instead, she sat down in a huff and folded her arms.

"I don't want a brother or sister anymore. I am perfectly content with Varr and Reinn, she said angrily.

"Oh, come now. You have told me otherwise many times. Besides, this won't last forever. Tomorrow your mummy can tuck you in," Malmury countered, trying to lift her spirits.

"My 'mummy'? You confuse me sometimes,"

"It's what we called them back home,"

"When you lived in the woods?" her tone was so innocent and Malmury laughed. He nodded and said, "Yes, when I lived in the woods. Anyway, stop bickering with me and get under those covers,"

Lina shook her head full of limp, loose curls, but obeyed, nonetheless. She climbed over the side of her bed and began to furiously beat her fist into one plump pillow.

"I believe you haven't washed nor changed that disgusting ensemble of yours," Malmury gently reminded, pushing back his chair and stretching his arms.

Lina made a face and insisted, "I did nothing today to warrant a change of dress! That man just sat me on the floor-"

"Your father," Malmury pressed, sitting down beside her.

"Yes- that- him. Yes, him. I- I miss Mother!"

And suddenly she was in tears.

Malmury gently guided her away from her pillow and she leaned into him with the ferocious eagerness of a neglected child. She pressed her wet face against him, and a sad flood of incoherent, childish shrieks poured out of her. Malmury lost his cynic wit and sympathetically kissed the top of her head.

"Lina…Lina you know you are still your mother's baby. That'll never get taken away. Don't cry Lina, she'll be in soon…"

She sobbed a few more minutes, and only started to sniffle back her tears when Malmury asked her if she wanted a story time. He felt her nod, and so they made their way to the rocking chair in the corner, where Lina wrapped herself in a blanket and climbed up on her caretaker's lap.

" 'Scourge of the Valhallan Halls: Passages of the Giant-Trickster Loki'," Malmury quoted, opening the book he had taken to reading, each night when she fell asleep.

"Mother would not approve," Lina whispered, getting comfortable, and closing her eyes.

"I'm sure your mother would want you to know of the demonic activities of this one, Li. Besides, you won't let me read you anything a normal child would enjoy,"

But she was too tired to take part in his usual, insulting banter, and instead listened intently when he paused and then finally cleared his throat to read. Sleep came easily, after that.

"Isibel's time of repentance is over. The maids are making her comfortable and throwing out the sheets as we speak. She is very grateful and content right now," The Man said, thin arm outstretched and clutching the door behind him.

"I'm very glad. Won't you sit down, sir? You must be exhausted," Malmury purred.

The Man seemed to consider it and then closed his eyes, refusing, "I mustn't. I must prepare for the ceremonial welcome in the morning. The people will want to know everything that has happened,

today,"

"Have you chosen a name, sir?"

Again, he hesitated and appeared to grow annoyed. "No, that was the furthest thought from my mind,"

He turned to leave.

"Sir?"

"Yes?"

"What did your wife bring into the world this fine, glorious evening?"

The Man turned and his cloaks flailed behind him confidently.

"A baby girl,"

And then he slipped out the door and closed it behind him gently.

Malmury continued to rock thoughtfully in the chair and narrowed his eyes.

"She's so…tiny!"

Lina had the baby in her thin arms and stared at her with a mixture of wonder and resentment. Malmury knew overall, that she was pleased.

"Yes, so tiny that she looks just right in your arms. And you're a little one, yourself!" he said, and Lina continued to practice smiling at her new sibling. Malmury figured that her expressions were genuine.

"Oh, thank you for keeping her quiet yesterday," Isibel whispered, from her bedside. Malmury bowed his head at her and she closed her eyes and smiled. "I so very much wanted to speak with Lina to…to have her observe this. But I think it would have been too early. Too traumatic. Besides, for awhile I thought…"

Malmury shushed her and sat in the wooden chair, taking her hand. "You did your best, my liege, and I am grateful that you are safe and healthy enough to have us here this morning," he leaned in close to her pale face and whispered, "she was very worried about you,"

Isibel chuckled and then grimaced, but her tone was light and rich, "I know what she is thinking right now, just as my boys did when she was born. I shall reassure her when I don't feel so damned tired and sapped of energy,"

Malmury laughed as she let go of his hand and rubbed her hand on the bedside, calling for her daughter. Lina came eagerly, holding out her baby sister as if she were a tray of food she was ready to dispose of.

"My darling," Isibel murmured happily, gazing into Lina's eyes and smiling. Lina climbed up beside her and gently eased the baby back into her mother's arms.

"She's kind of boring," Lina remarked casually.

Isibel pretended to be shocked and then chuckled, "Li Li, she will be boring until the day she begins to babble and roll like you did. And that isn't too far away,"

"You're responsible for her noble upbringing," Malmury commented quickly, and Lina rolled her eyes.

"I've missed you,"

"I've missed you too,"

"Oh shut up, Malmury,"

"Yes, my liege"

"I missed you too, Mo-Mother," Lina croaked, and climbed over her legs, settling herself beside her mother. Isibel put an arm around her and Lina cuddled to her breast.

For awhile, the three of them sat like that; Isibel, Lina and the newborn cradled together, and Malmury sitting at their bedside, his arms folded. The two maids milled about the room, checking the hot water bottle at their lady's feet or dusting negative space.

"What is her name?" Lina inquired suddenly.

Isibel turned her head and smiled softly at her. "I was thinking of a few names yesterday as I was giving birth to her,"

"Did F-Father help you choose?" Lina asked softly, watching the baby's gentle movements, as Isibel held her close.

"No…" she trailed off and then said triumphantly, "but Esja is a lovely name,"

"It's beautiful!" Malmury chimed in.

"I thought so too," Isibel whispered, her eyes closing again.

Lina said nothing. She watched the sweat glistening on her mother's brow and suddenly felt like an intruder. Malmury caught her eye and stared at her hard. She wanted to leave and to not have to look at that baby, but he was warning her to stay put.

It was an easy choice, since she loved her mother.

"Lina, must you be such a little witch sometimes?"

"I am NOT!" Lina snarled, her voice reverberating off her 4 walls, when they were safe once more in her chambers, "She loves the baby more than I!"

Malmury suddenly leapt at her in two short strides and was on his knees in front of her in a flash. Lina gasped in fright.

"You are an educated little girl," he said slowly, holding her little girl hands in his, "and you know better than that. I can't believe that you would think a wonderful woman like your mother would simply choose a pecking order for her own children. Shame on you,"

Lina lowered her head and her lips began to quiver.

"You are loved, Li, and you know this. I love you, your mother loves you, and your older brothers love you. You are the centre of this castle; the people's guiding light and foremost precious angel. You are their prodigy, and you will not be the gentle, majestic younger sibling whom your subjects will stay loyal to when they turn their backs on Varr, if you act ignorant of something so clear and apparent,"

Tears began to swim in Lina's eyes and she looked up at him with a hurt so deep and unhidden, that his heart broke. He nodded slightly and said again, "You know this,"

Lina squeezed her eyes shut and the tears slipped past her blonde eyelashes as she trembled in effort not to sob.

"I will never have a baby!" she howled, and threw herself around his neck.

"Shhh…shhh. Don't say that, you don't mean it. Lina…Lina! Lina, please, not so loud, your father…"


	3. Mission to Deep Space

_"I must confess that our trek through the green waters of this horrid place was not pleasurable at all," the valkyrie commented, as she led the way through the darkened corridors. Her presence was a fine and dry one though, and there was no hint of dampness in her hair to be seen._

_"I would imagine that they would be filled with corpses! But there is nothing…" the one clad in green, said._

_"Whomever laid waste to this temple, did so with the intention of annihilating every single being and their soon-to-be rotten remains. The reason that we see no remnants further plunges its hallowed halls into a deeper state of despair and loneliness," the valkyrie told her, matter-of-factly, "this destruction bled with purpose,"_

_"But we've seen nothing, Valkyrie. Aren't we here to destroy the undead?" the boy said, drawing close to her. The four stopped walking and glanced around them. Only the sound of gently, lapping waters in the distance could be heard._

_She eyed the dark, looming archway at the end of their path with interest and said, "I suspect that our foes wait beyond the quiet entrance of this place. Do not be fooled by the silence,"_

_"Valkyrie, behind you! A light!"_

_The valkyrie and her boy companion turned sharply, in time to see a pale green orb materialize and hover a few feet from the ground. The man and woman stood on the other side of it and immediately brandished their spears and held them forth, ready. The light seemed to intensify directly in its core, and then the orb shot up above them and flickered out._

_"What was-" the woman said, but the valkyrie held up her palm for silence, mouth parted in surprise. Quietly, her three Einherjar turned about and eyed the corridor but nothing presented itself. They noticed the valkyrie's brows knit in defiance and she stared directly at the spot where the orb had appeared._

_"Return from whence you came! These once-sacred halls are no place for a darkened soul such as yours!"_

_The three turned suddenly and watched the valkyrie stare coldly at the space between them._

_"But my lady valkyrie, there is nothing-" the spearman began but she straightened her body and her eyes flared. He fell silent._

_"Nor are they a place for Odin's vultures, arriving just in time to commune with its dead and passed on. Tell me valkyrie, is it by any chance that your master sent you 1000 years too late?"_

_All three gasped aloud and the valkyrie narrowed her eyes._

_"I have no knowledge of the event you speak of. Even so, I am not your salvation, sent here to undo all the atrocities and carnage that your people endured. The Almighty Odin does not rectify your mortal mistakes," she shot back, voice calm and commanding. A thin hazy figure of a man melted out of the air between she and her Einherjar._

_"My people…my people did not shut themselves in a prison, rupturing their knees due to unheeded prayer after unheeded prayer. My people were merely subservient lambs, herded into a life of strict routine and slavery," the figure said, with a lilt of amusement in his voice. The arms outstretched and the Einherjars followed his hands as if they were being formally introduced to the wrecked temple they now stood in._

_"This…this was good. This did not happen to my people,"_

_The valkyrie seemed to have lost her suspicious nature, and her eyebrow was cocked lazily at the spirit. Nonetheless, her hand rested upon the hilt of her sheathed sword._

_"So, you are not the spiritual remains of an unfortunate victim?"_

_"No, I am not," the figure said, and his eyes seemed to roam past her, sadly. Then he concentrated on the valkyrie again, saying, "if anything, I helped set this in motion. A tragedy at the very least, but I don't linger here just because I feel sorry,"_

_"Then why?"_

_For the first time, the figure began to move. His feet were not visible, rather his legs melted into the floor and he seemed to glide through it. The valkyrie noticed his human characteristics and was at once mystified by the way he paced._

_"I suppose it's because we are both doomed to an eternal life of sacrifice, of bondage,"_

_The valkyrie's eyes peered at him curiously, " 'We'? Is there more than one confused soul listlessly wandering through here?"_

_"No, I am alone," and the figure smiled._

_"You are happy about this?" The valkyrie was puzzled._

_"Of course not," he said, gazing at her once more, through a veil of brown hair falling into his eyes, "but what good is it to wallow in the past when I am doomed to spend the next thousand years in the Shrine of Neb?"_

_" 'Neb'?" the valkyrie repeated, "what sort of tongue did you once speak?"_

_"Many, death goddess, many," the figure responded quickly, moving closer to her. The boy behind her pushed his readied bow into sight and crept to her side. The valkyrie touched his side lightly, and he dropped his weapon down, hesitantly._

_The figure regarded all of this with what seemed to be a sardonic smile._

_"This was once a shrine of worship to the gods of Aesir. In the days that it thrived, the Shrine of Neb was surrounded by a thick sea of woods in all directions. The displaced peoples of Lycoris built their stronghold here, in the middle of these woods and scattered its native tribes for miles around. Some of these forest-walkers, as we were called by them, were kidnapped and sold to the so-called royal family of Lycoris seeking a new land to base their small empire,"_

_"You are the vengeful spirit of a race of people who was captured for the common usage of a noble bloodline?" the valkyrie asked in perplexity._

_"Not quite vengeful. I was born into slavery and thus, I never fought the cold war on the front lines. I was angry for what my family had to go through, though. I was angry that the nobles were so insensitive to the plight of those in unison with the earth,"_

_The valkyrie tilted her head and seemed to regard him, laughingly. The figure's translucent hands were clenched into large fists and he was hunched over her, with a distant sort of anger in his eyes._

_"Perhaps you will realize that it is folly to give yourselves to the Vanir then," she remarked._

_"Your master would strike you down for speaking again your superior, death goddess. You know nothing," the figure retorted, gliding back a few inches, effortlessly._

_"Hm. I suppose you are aching to fuel my quest for knowledge then, restless spirit,"_

_"Don't mock me. I know you aren't here to obtain any sort of knowledge, but rather to disturb the dead. You waste your time. They won't recognize you or even hurt you if you just express your intent to leave. This isn't your place," the figure spat, turning now to gaze at the two Einherjar still baring arms. They regarded him harshly, and held their spears before them._

_"But it is my duty," the valkyrie intoned, her voice rising in power and confidence, "and if I say I wish to know of the sort of holy retribution that tore through this blasphemed underworld, then you shall look me in the eye and relieve yourself of the burden you have carried for too long. A defiled and disgraced temple such as this will be cleansed by my hand,"_

_The figure turned and eyed her warily. He almost seemed frightened, but he pursed his lips and stepped closer to her._

_"Why not, then? For you shall be facing the product of this mass destruction very sooner than you think,"_

_"It serves you no purpose to be cryptic with me," the valkyrie scoffed airily, "now tell me the names of the aforementioned nobles, and the nation that used to prosper here. I am interested,"_


End file.
